The Walking Dead is presenting us with new characters. Spoiler alert: you won’t care about them.
We can all agree that there are certain aspects of AMC’s The Walking Dead that seem a little, shall we say, far-fetched. The most improbable of these scenarios will be reviewed here each week.
“Too Long, Didn’t Watch” Episode Recap
Daryl, Sasha and Abraham get ambushed in a town and are separated. Daryl encounters three idiots who he tries to save despite their repeated threats, and they end up dead (one of them) or stealing his bike and crossbow (the other two). Meanwhile, Sasha and Abraham hole up in an insurance office. Abraham finds cigars and a rocket launcher, although he almost gets stupidly killed retrieving the latter. He hits on Sasha afterward. Next week, hopefully we bring this whole thing together, because this is getting ridiculous.
This diabetic chick sure does have a well-maintained haircut.
Good luck sleeping on the floor right next to a walker pounding on a glass door. I don’t even think Lunesta could help in that situation.
If Abraham had to name three things he would bring to a desert island, cigars and rocket launchers would be two of them. The third: porn.1
They did such a poor job tying Daryl’s hands that he could wiggle out of the ropes in 10 seconds.
Diabetes Gal (I don’t even want to bother to know her name) gets herself killed at the first opportunity by leaning down towards ambiguously-dead bodies without double-tapping. How did she last this long?
What exactly was Abraham trying to do in that scene with the hanging walker? I honestly cannot figure it out. Calgon, take me away.
So the three geniuses who take Daryl hostage think that he is part of the group that they left? Wouldn’t they know if he was or not, because they were there? My head hurts.
This Abraham/Sasha love plot came so far out of left field that I honestly didn’t know what Abraham was talking about at first. These two have no chemistry and almost nothing in common, and Abraham is “dating” Rosita (last we heard). Barf.
I do not understand how Daryl managed to get the Three Idiots away from the random folks in the truck. I do not understand who the truck people were, or how they are so dumb that they get bitten by trapped walkers. I do not understand where the truck people went after that. Sometimes it just feels like this show is insulting the viewers, as if we will just put up with all the ambiguity they can throw at us and say “please, sir, may I have some more?”
Who ambushed them in the opening scene, and why do we never hear about them again? They just set up a huge trap like that and then disappeared without finishing the job? Anyone? Bueller?2
The insulin was in a cooler because it can’t get warm. How the fuck did they get ice for the cooler? There is extremely limited electricity. I’ll bet ice is as rare as a virgin in a frat house. The sad truth is a diabetic wouldn’t last too long into a zombie apocalypse, between the lack of food and the inability to keep insulin on ice.
Upon my husband viewing this and seeing the Three Idiots in what feels like their thousandth scene of the episode, he said “What are they even talking about?” Exactly, Husband. Exactly. Nobody knows. Nobody cares.