Welcome back to The Bachelorette, the show where apparently you can just show up at the house and be a potential suitor. Welcome to LA, Andi!
Here’s the story. Andi Dorfman, an attractive young lawyer from Atlanta who famously departed the previous season of The Bachelor because Juan Pablo was too self-involved to ask her anything about herself, is the new Bachelorette. We learn that she’s leaving her job as a prosecutor to “go on this journey” but she’s still driving a Lexus. Her parents and sister are supportive and she really wants to find love. Hopefully she’ll follow the Rules of the Rose:
Don’t: Think, scratch that ‘feel’ that love is there for you, Andi. It’s not. Remember when you felt it last time and it wasn’t there.
Do: Keep the Bachelorette under lock and key. Tasos brings a lock a la Lovers Bridge in Paris and Andi falls for it immediately.
Don’t: Make a joke you haven’t tested first, extensively.
Do: Be just odd enough, bringing a lamp is too much, pretending to push the limo up the hill because it ‘broke down’ is the right amount of cute.
Don’t: Worry about being too sweet. Marquell is a rock star with his idea of a cookie tasting. Even Andi admits he has some swag, especially with the not so subtle black and white cookie.
Do: Make sure you’re actually a ‘contestant’ on the Bachelor. Chris, from Emily Maynard’s season of the show arrives at the mansion unexpectedly and asks to talk to Andi, he’s fully dressed in a suit and tie, with flowers quickly confiscated by security as he awaits a producer. He apparently was so into Andi last season that he was compelled to go to Los Angeles. He knew where the mansion was, but not the exact night of the arrivals, so he’s been staking out the place for SEVEN days. While at first The Bachelorette seems to give him props for being so bold and then realizes it’s not fair to the other contestants and Chris Harrison breaks the bad news. We assume Bachelor Chris eventually leaves, but not before begging and pleading just to see Andi. We’re surprised he’s not yelling “Andi, you Goonie!” on his way out.
Do: WATCH THE BACHELORETTE (and the movie The Goonies), can’t wait for more surprises!