5 Awesome Things from Nashville’s Pre-Tour Drama

Nashville (Screen: ABC)

Nashville Season 2 Episode 18: Your Wild Life’s Gonna Get You Down — And the award for Meanest Scarlett Impersonation goes to… Juliette!
Rayna’s single tanks in the wake of Juliette announcing herself as Highway 65’s new artist, while Will’s single scores big for Edgehill. Despite Ms. Jaymes’s distaste for social media, she hopes a live stream of her performance at Luke’s Nashville tour stop will give her the bump she needs. Scarlett and her new producer (also ex-boyfriend) Avery are sent on the road with (his current girlfriend) Juliette, who is none too pleased about sharing her man with (the other) Blondie. Luke, Will and Deacon’s tour rolls back into town for a few days, leading to all manner of hijinx. Will and Layla announce their engagement to Gunnar, who wonders how this will bode for his secretly gay pal. Deacon reunites with Megan, who is quite eager to forget about cheating with Teddy. Luke invites Rayna, Maddie and Daphne to meet his obnoxious, media savvy teenage son, Colt. An incensed Teddy learns Maddie has snuck out to a music lesson with his nemesis/her biological dad Deacon. When Teddy tries to ground Maddie for eternity, Rayna balks because she wants their daughter to meet Luke’s kid – at the very concert Deacon will be opening. Meanwhile, Jeff the exec stalks around the perimeter, alternately sussing out Will’s sexuality and threatening Rayna. Oh, tour drama! Isn’t it just made for soap operas? Here are five awesome things from last night’s Nashville.

Just when you thought they were getting a bit too cozy… Everyone knows Rayna and Highway 65 are being blackballed because Country Music still hates Juliette, but Ms. Barnes has too much ego to take all the blame. Just before she hits the road with Scarlett and Avery, she asks her new boss what she’s supposed to do. Rayna says, “Go out there and make some noise. Win back those fans and those radio stations one city at a time.” That’s when Jules busts out the gritted teeth grin. “I have spent $500,000 of my own money to promote these dates so I’m just not quite sure how much more noise I can make.” That’s right, Rayna’s broke right now – go for the jugular, Juliette. Keep the cat fight alive!

Gaydar overdrive Jeff can’t figure why Will is marrying has-been Layla if she isn’t knocked up. “If pregnancy isn’t the issue, maybe there’s another reason for your rush to the altar.” God bless him, Will puts on his best “aw shucks” face and says, “Yeah, sure. It’s called love! I mean, maybe you enjoy this big city bachelor lifestyle, but where I come from we still believe in drinking cold beer and marrying hot women.” Oh, Will. Excepting the time you tried to make out with Gunnar, that little speech might be your biggest “not really hetero” tell yet.

Young ladies, this is why you shouldn’t try to impress goofy teenage boys Colt is a snotty, rich, white kid in a backwards baseball cap who hates his country rock star dad’s music. When Maddie asks him what kind of music he does like, he sighs. “Skrillex. EDM. Rap. Anything with a sick beat. Not that you’d know anything about that.” That’s when Maddie and Daphne bust into one of those handclappy, snappy duets that little girls do (a la “Miss Suzy Had a Steamboat”), but set to one of their lovely bluegrass harmonies. BOOM, take that, Colt! He says, “That’s actually kinda dope,” and records them. Groan. Then he posts the video online, and even more hijinx follow.

Everything you’ve ever wanted to say about Scarlett, extra bitchy Scarlett wants to perform a new ballad at their Seattle show, but Juliette forbids downer tunes, hissing, “For God’s sake, bring some spark to the party!” (This prompts Scarlett to pop a bunch of speed.) When Avery confronts Jules about her meanness, she simply responds, “Is she always that squirrelly?” then imitates Scarlett’s anxious, twitchy face. Of course, we all know Juliette is just insecure about sharing the stage with her beau’s ex. An unusually ballsy Scarlett makes this point herself, just before begging Juliette to fire her because she can’t handle the pressures of touring. Jules refuses. “Because you’ve got it. That sensitivity of yours, that raw nerve, that’s what’s gonna make you great.” And now they’re fighting on the same team. Yay! They even get drunk together after the show. At the end of the night, Juliette playfully tells Scarlett to stay out of trouble, then turns to Avery and says, “Is she high?… Something about her reminds me of my mom.” Girl, you’re batting a thousand, tonight.

Gone viral Ultra protective mom Rayna freaks when she learns Colt posted his video of Maddie and Daphne for all 20,000 of his followers. Luke freaks, too and makes his son take it down. Then Colt and Maddie have a “parents suck” moment as they watch Luke, Will and Deacon perform on stage. Maddie makes some remark about a super cool dad who isn’t Teddy, which presumably makes Colt curious. Because next thing you know, Luke is showing Rayna a “Maddie Claybourne” Youtube video, which Colt had showed to him. Rayna freaks again, confronts Maddie backstage (yes, they are still at Luke’s Nashville concert, this all happened in one night), and pleads with her to take the Youtube video down, “before it all gets out of control.” Oh, is that how that works? Tune in next week, when the entire world learns Maddie is Deacon’s daughter.

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Tara Rose
About Tara Rose 106 Articles
Since 2009, Tara has been writing snarky essays about pop culture, motherhood and her various neuroses at Rare Oats. She spends most of her other time selling cheese, raising a small human and goofing off with her husband Dan. E-mail: tara@whatelseison.tv
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