On week three of the least expensive to produce season of The Bachelor in several years, we travel to exotic Long Beach, CA.
No really, exotic Long Beach and Scenic Downtown Pasadena, California. Maybe this season of The Bachelor is just a bit more down to earth. It is afterall “parents night” and it seems the best way to win a rose from Juan Pablo is to either BE a parent, or act, just enough, like you NEED a parent.
DO: Find The Bachelor’s daughter Camilla adorable, because she is, in both English and Spanish. Extra points if you…
DO: Also have a child. Juan Pablo says he doesn’t want to waste Cassandra’s time because she also has a child and is taking time away for this…but don’t think that doesn’t mean he’s not making the most of your time by sending you home.
DON’T: Be childish enough to think that your date card referencing a ‘wild ride’ means a Safari, you’re in LA
DO: Recall the fun and games of your youth. If The Bachelor was a professional soccer player you can assume you’ll eventually play soccer. You can be the best and win, the worst and need personal coaching or kick hard and send all of the other women to the hospital. Nikki was admittedly not an athlete but had no problem trying to kick the soccer ball through another girl’s body, and then she got the date’s only rose.
DONT: Tell producers of The Bachelor your actual worst fear, especially if it’s heights or you’ll find yourself embracing that fear of heights while jumping off a bridge, Chelsea. Probably after a sacarin sweet walk through Old Town (Insert Small Traditional California City or just Pasadena) Streets.
DO: Expect The Bachelor to come by the house unexpectedly at some point, probably in the morning, probably earlier than you want. and…
DON’T: Be a baby about it. Please sleep accordingly. As Kelli’s mom says you don’t want a man to see you without your face on. And if nothing else Renee, brush your teeth.
DO: Realize that if someone else is ‘trying too hard’ you’re probably not trying hard enough, but please…
DON’T: Cry on The Bachelor! How many times have we been over this! It may save you for now, but in the long run you’re just the girl that couldn’t handle it. And that girl is never picked as the next Bachelorette.