Sleepy Hollow Season 1 Episode 7: The Midnight Ride

Like all good characters in horror movies Morales wanders slowly into the alley while saying ‘Who is that?’ and only putting his hand on his gun1 when he gets within, like, ten feet of the now silent shape. It’s Deputy Andy! Morales is much less enthused about this development and pulls out his weapon2 and says, mildly stunned, “I thought you were dead!” Andy has raised his hands to show no threat and we see the back of his left hand is either decomposing or has some sort of brand on it. Again, not the clearest sign in an episode full of unclear signs. “Rumors of my demise have been… pretty much true.” he says. I want that on a t-shirt with John Cho’s face. Internet, make that happen.

Now things get interesting. Andy tells Morales to steer clear of Abbie – that only he, Andy, can protect her from “the end”. While informing Morales of the war all around him to which he, Morales, is blind, Andy uses his undead super-speed to force Morales to his knees and shove Morales’ gun up under his jaw.3 He helps Morales to his feet and speaks more gently that it’ll soon be time for Morales to pick a side. Morales gets momentarily distracted by the crackle of police radios as two cops walk by on the street and when he turns back… Andy has vanished.

Abbie gets in her car and listens to a rather erudite and formal voicemail from Ichabod whilst driving along the back roads of the Hollow. There’s further disconnect between Ichabod’s actual words regarding the magic of voicemails on ‘Smart phones’ and the closed captions, but the important part is Ichabod agrees that Abbie should not be barred from these important meetings with the Masons because of something as silly as having a particular set of genitalia, and he resolves to remedy this immediately; she should come and join them as soon as she is able. He is, most respectfully, Ichabod Crane – and he’s just arrived at a rather quiet mansion. Banging and shattering from another room lead Ichabod to arm himself with a convenient sabre and advance stealthily in search of the source. Seriously, if this were the Scream franchise the episodes would be about six minutes long.

Abbie parks on the street outside4 and spies the Horseman in one well-lit and un-curtained room and Ichabod two rooms away, making forward with a purpose. No! Don’t open that door! Virgins can die now! Ichabod finds several headless (and presumably dead) Masons in the dining room and relieves one of them of a .45. He’s about to enter the room where last the Horseman was seen when – jump moment! – Abbie grabs his shoulder from behind. Amazingly he doesn’t scream his fool head off like I almost did and the two burst into the room – to see the Horseman already outside the house, triumphantly riding off with a mesh bag of some things. Credits!

  1. His service pistol, you perverts.  
  2. Again – not. Like. That.  
  3. Still not like that.  
  4. And apparently this mansion is not in the middle of a deep forest or swamp as it appeared when Ichabod approached, but in fact in a normal residential neighborhood. Y’all just loved that exterior shot of the massive front door and pillars, did ya?  

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About Aaron Mucciolo 206 Articles
He does things. That's all we can say at this time. E-mail: mooch@whatelseison.tv